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Meanwhile in the studio... |
James: And now the news and oh! Before we do that, has anyone watched all five "Mabel's Guide To" shorts? Anyone?
(audience murmuring)
Richard: I do...I saw all five this week.
Jeremy: No I don't...
(audience laughing)
Jeremy: What is it?
James: Just another bunch of Gravity Falls shorts, done to keep the fallers hooked for more while this show's not around until further notice from the showrunner himself. You know last year's Dipper's Guide to the Unexplained shorts? Yep, made to keep the fans happy while the show's not around. This year sees the turn of Mabel Pines.
Jeremy: Mabel Pines? (raspberry) Never liked her...
(audience laughing)
Richard: Why?
Jeremy: She's as gross as nerds at schools and her breath smells like...an episode of Brainiac! If you know what I mean?
(audience laughing)
Jeremy: Anyway, what's it all about those recent Gravity Falls shorts? You know? Some GF fun in bite-sized chunks?
James: Well, in random order, there was...Mabel's Guide To Art, and then Mabel's Guide To Dating...
Richard: Well, kinda like that one. It's the one with those!
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TOAD-ALLY DATING! |
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HOOT DO YOU LOVE?! |
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TOGETHER FUR-EVER |
(audience laughing)
Richard: See? Oh yeah, which reminds me...I need you to fill those 9000-question stuff...just to show if you guys are datable or not.
(audience laughing)
Jeremy: What?! 9000 questions? That's too much!
James: Yeah! We don't have time answering those...
Richard: Now or never!
(both): Okay...
SOME TIME LATER...
Richard: Right, I got the results. Jeremy, based on all your answers and at the scale of 5, you are...3 out of 5 so you're DATABLE!
Jeremy: Oh!
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DATABLE! |
(audience laughing)
Richard: Oh wait! Your dating is limited to widows, female plumbers, and convicts...
Jeremy: What?!
(audience laughing)
SOME TIME LATER, LATER...
James: (sigh)...enough about that. Anyway, back to this week's shorts. There was Mabel's Guide To Fashion, Mabel's Guide To Colors, and Mabel's Guide To Stickers. Speaking of which, what was that?!
Richard: It's my hair topiary!
(audience laughing)
James: But you're a bloke. You don't do that to yourself.
Richard: Well, I got a female member of the audience to do it. So, what does it look like to you?
Female Audience: An ostrich?
Richard: Right! An ostrich! Kakka!
(audience laughing)
Richard: Make sure you fix your hair before you leave.
Jeremy: Anyway, some bad news because last night, there was a
bus accident occurred in Bontoc, killing about 14 people when the bus they rode fell on the ravine. That sounds quite tragic but...something shocked us that one of the 14 people died on the incident was a celebrity. Does anyone know who's that celeb?
(audience murmuring)
Jeremy: Well, there's one celebrity involved in the accident and died. It was Tado!
James: Tado?
Jeremy: Tado, yeah, the comedian, Tado Jimenez was one of the casualties in last night's bus accident in Bontoc. That sounds very very sad to us so...REST IN PEACE TADO. We will never forget you.
(awwww)
Richard: Very sad to say goodbye to one of the most notable Pinoy comedians but what's quite remembering that he once had a heavy metal affliction with a classic VW Beetle. See, look?
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Photos from Tado Jimenez's Facebook profile |
(oooohhh)
Jeremy: Shhh...
James: (silently) What?
(audience laughing)
Jeremy: (whispering) I'm afraid that the next topic is going to be quite hurtful for us?
Richard: Like what?
Jeremy: Shhh...
(audience laughing)
Jeremy: (whispering) Whatever you do...don't say the CS word.
James: (whispering) You mean Cardcaptor Sakura?
Jeremy (facepalm)
(audience laughing)
James: What? What was I'm saying?!
Jeremy: That's what we're not supposed to say and since the beans are spilled on us, looks like fans of the anime that caused us a lot of bashers are going to be pleased by this but not us because we had tons of bashers caused by this anime.
(audience laughing)
Jeremy: Anyway, MOVIC's replicating Sakura's Sealing Wand and Star Wand made out of die-cast zinc and each is about 6 inches long. They're part of MOVIC's new Eternal Masterpiece line of collectibles for adults but who cares? Since this anime's ruined our childhood several times, we don't want it.
(audience laughing)
James: Even if those 6-inch replicas cost 34 US Dollars each?
Jeremy: Never. We don't want pieces from the show that ruined our childhood several times.
(audience laughing)
Jeremy: I didn't actually like one of their closing theme songs that goes...Na na na na na na...na na na na na na na...na na na na na na na naaaaahhhhhh....
(audience laughing)
Richard: Well, that's the one I don't really like to hear!
(audience laughing)
Jeremy: It's not all about that...you know the Chevrolet Corvette C7 Stingray? The car we all hate because of all the backstories like for instance...why NAMCO didn't put Punkish Gothic on the PS3 version on THE iDOLM@STER 2 and why Top Gear was revoked from Gran Turismo 6? Anyway, this car's going to appear on CAPTAIN AMERICA: THE WINTER SOLDIER as the car of choice from SHIELD'S Black Widow.
(ooohhh)
Richard: Looks quite interesting for a car of choice to one of SHIELD's finest! I must say that Corvettes are quite a rarity for Marvel stuff since Agent Coulson's Corvette called Lola as seen from the Avengers film and AGENTS OF SHIELD TV series.
Jeremy: I know, but still...as a warning to those who keep wishing for a C7 Corvette to be on Forza 5...
Jeremy: Inject this on your brains, Forza Faithfuls! The C7 Corvette is not invited to your Forza Motorsport 5 party because as always told...this car's a Gran Turismo exclusive and that's the end of it!
(audience laughing)
James: Uh, don't you think you should be ending this whole story? I guess you're becoming more of a big head right now because...oh, what the hey? What's the argument about why you're hating this car since no Top Gear in GT6 and no Punkish Gothic in PS3 iM@S 2?
Jeremy: Well, you know what I said. For those who keep asking for a C7 Corvette to be in Forza 5, go back to your Gran Turismo games. You know for the thousandth time that this car stays in Gran Turismo series and always will be and oh, the new Z06 and the C7.R are reserved for future installments so BACK OFF, THAT'S NOT FOR FORZA FANS!
(audience laughing)
Richard: Oh well, once a big head moron, always a big head moron. Anyway, that is the end of the news...